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Sunday, March 17th, 2002
11:09 pm - Farewell My Love
Hello, this is peaberry's husband speaking to you. I have some very bad news. On Monday, March 11, my wife passed away due to complications from her cancer.

I have never had any contact with the majority of the readers of this journal. Those of you I do know I have contacted separately (please let me know if I missed sending you an email). I am somewhat at a loss as to what to say to the rest of you.

I know some of you followed peaberry's journal due to her being a cancer patient, or looked to her for inspiration for dealing with difficulties in life. This news has probably hit you the hardest, so let me address some comments to you. The important thing to take away from this sad event is not how she died, it is how she lived, and that was with courage, strength, humor, and a positive attitude. She brightened the lives of everyone she touched, and that amounts to a lot of goodness in the world. And even though she is now gone, we have wonderful memories of her and can still draw inspiration from the way she embraced life every day.

So please remember Anna Pope, aka peaberry, as a joyous spirit who touched so many lives.

Farewell My Love. I miss you so much, but I will honor your memory by not giving up, and by trying to make the best of my life to come.

- George Pope, aka peaberry's loving husband

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Monday, February 11th, 2002
7:05 pm - Zzzzzzzzzz *snrk* wha????
Egads, I'm sleepy!

Things are going reasonably well, though. I have successfully eaten three Club crackers and 1/4 c of Cheerios, and kept them down. Next up, more crackers and (oooh, ahhhh!) applesauce. Contrary to modern dietetic thought, my goal is to avoid fiber and unprocessed foods. *g*

I think maybe I really over... well, I'd like to say exerted, but I haven't actually done much...tired myself over the past few days. I'm going to try to be better about sleeping, and napping. I got about 14 hours of sleep last night and I'm still dragging. Bleagh.

I have my two second opinion appointments set up, for Friday and next Monday, and getting all the paperwork and slides and assorted detritus I need is in the pipeline. I don't expect that they'll advise anything different, but it's good to be sure.

My cats are becoming entirely spoiled, since as far as they can tell I have morphed into a gigantic cat with opposable thumbs. :) They spend nearly all their time attempting to sleep on me.

current mood: sleepy

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Friday, February 8th, 2002
10:43 am - Ugh. Last night sucked.
10:30pm got hooked up to my IV - a little late but in the ballpark.

of pumps which go shriek in the nightCollapse )

current mood: philosophical

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Wednesday, February 6th, 2002
5:29 pm - I'm home! :)
Actually, I have been for a while - since Friday, Feb. 1. Friday was a really hoary day. 6:30am on rounds they said I might go home as early as Sunday. 10:30am they pulled my naso-gastro tube and said "Go home now." By 2:30pm I was gone.

But not eating! Oh no! I have a home health care service and a nifty little backpack-based IV nutrition system. It is amazing how well I am maintaining energy on IV; I'm really impressed. And I have been supplementing with liquids. Thus far I have graduated to 'full liquids', which includes pudding. I don't think I've made real pudding in 20 years. I'd forgotten how a) easy and b) damn tasty it is, although at this point I am desperately craving food which requires *chewing*. *sigh* :-P

But I'm being very good and not cheating although sometimes the temptation is harsh. Other than that... my pain control is excellent, my energy levels are good under the circumstances (although I'm really just vegging, and expect to for another few weeks), my spirits are mostly good.

I have a checkup and meeting with my oncologist tomorrow, and we'll be discussing the pathology and the battleplan. My understanding is that there will be a couple more weeks recuperation before any battles ensue, although they keep changing stuff on me so fast, you never know.

So, more later, and "Hi!". I missed y'all.

(Heh, and I have to get a new userpic because I have hair now, and not much confidence that I still will in another couple/few months.)

current mood: mellow

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Sunday, January 20th, 2002
12:33 am - Well, shit. Or 'no shit', as the case may be.
I'm sending this via courier from a remote location, the lovely hospital room I've been occupying since Sunday the 13th; and will likely be in until nearly February. Sunday the 13th I had a reoccurrence of the lovely digestive events of Sunday the 6th, and went to the emergency room.

Well, I've got a partial bowel obstruction. I'm going in for surgery to correct it on Tuesday the 22nd, and hope to be home a week or so after that. Depending on whether or not a recurrence of my cancer is involved, I may have more chemo or some radiation therapy - oh, joy.


Take care. I'll check in again when I come back home post-op.

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Thursday, January 10th, 2002
10:09 pm - Hee hee! :)
(hear me roar!)

<td></td><td width="400">
You know all and see all, but that doesn't prevent you from having a child-like innocence and a playful sense of humor. You obviously think very highly of yourself, but that's okay, everyone does. Told ya God was a woman!!
Take The "Which Kevin Smith Female Are You?" Quiz!!
</td>

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Wednesday, January 9th, 2002
8:32 pm - Su-fucking-prise!
Oh, this is depressing. China is stepping up their nuke technology because of our "missile defense shield". Shit.

Read it and weep.

It wouldn't be *quite* so depressing if the shield had a chance of working.

current mood: pissed off

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1:39 pm - Home again, home again, jiggity jog...
... after a mostly-wonderful trip to not-so-sunny (but warm) California. The last few days have been a bit fraught, as I had a severely upset stomach and some concern about a possible obstruction, which would be quite worrisome given my recent health history. :-P But I seem to be okay at the moment.

details, details... travelogue and etc., and possible TMICollapse )

current mood: indescribable

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Friday, December 28th, 2001
12:08 am - First haircut!
Got mine today. :)

It's still sparser than I would like, but hopefully isn't done filling in yet.

And now we're off. I'll be back Jan. 8 or 9.

Happy New Year!

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Wednesday, December 26th, 2001
7:43 pm - rushrushrush!
Well, it's been a flurry of holiday activity here at peaberry central.

flurryflurryflurry!Collapse )

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Friday, December 21st, 2001
1:52 am - Milk and honey
... is highly underrated. I am a hot chocolate fan, but tonight I'm having hot milk with orange blossom honey, and it's just *yummy*!

Swoon.

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Tuesday, December 18th, 2001
7:27 pm - So, I hate crowds, and...
... therefore, on the brink of Frodo's debut, have just recently gone to see Harry Potter. And here are a few resultant thoughts.

What a lovely movie. We were really impressed. It's not often an author has enough clout and stubbornness to make the movie fit their vision so well.

And I am very pleased with Chris Columbus. I didn't think he had it in him to make a movie with no visible cynicism in it.

Alan Rickman... Robbie Coltrane... Wow...

... okay, I'm done, back to your LOTR dreams. :) (Which I have to say looks like it's going to be absolutely incredible, but dangit, they made Frodo not nearly hairy nor brown nor round enough to be a *hobbit*, did they? He's too elfin. I expect I'll get over it.)

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Monday, December 17th, 2001
6:23 pm - Waiting rooms; bleagh!
So, today I saw my hepatologist - yet another Dr. C. He's nice, quiet, and noncommittal. Everything he has on me is good, but he wants more information (ie more blood - five vials today, hurrah. I can't give blood any more but they're sucking it out of me just as fast as they did when I could. Faster, actually, with those marvy little vacuum tubes.) before saying what he really thinks of it all.

I was disappointed that he hadn't really looked at my files before I showed up. I made a point of having them get there early so that he'd have the chance. He was obviously not prepared for my bizarreness. Well, this was my first appointment and for a meet & greet it went okay.

Okeledoke; I gave up the blood. And I'll have another CT in January; and then we'll talk; and I have my next follow-up appt. with my oncologist in February.

I made an origami ball and filled it with cinnamon and cloves as a gift for M, the Oncology Goddess Receptionist. :) I hope she likes it, she didn't open the box while I was there.

Oh yeah, about the waiting rooms; the phlebotomy waiting room took 90 minutes, thanks in part to an overcoiffed pissy grandma-type who did not have the right paperwork and had not fasted for her test and was trying to browbeat the tech into drawing her anyway; and a young punk with a moving bullet in his arm. Woohoo. Sometimes I wish I had a nerf-bat and a license to bop, really I do.

And the hepatology waiting room is even grimmer than the oncology one. People having serious liver problems look really dire.

current mood: chipper

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Sunday, December 16th, 2001
12:22 am - Psst! Rivka!
I saw this elsenet and thought of you. :)

http://www.georgehart.com/trilobites/trilobite.html

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Friday, December 14th, 2001
9:01 pm - Woohoo!
I figured out the picture thing.

Lemme rephrase that; I started really *using* the picture feature. Yeah, that's the ticket! :)

current mood: pleased

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Tuesday, December 11th, 2001
11:49 pm - I know I'm not the only one who does this.
But I sure wish I knew why...

I *hate* going to bed on time. With a passion. Even when I know I should, when I'm really tired, when I have things to do the next day. Even if they're important things.

Heaven forfend someone tells me I should! That makes it even worse, especially if it's my mother (who's mostly gotten over it and doesn't do it very often - actually I think pretty much she's given up and only does it when she forgets that) or my mother-in-law (who is a nagger, and *not my mother*, thank you! and might as well have 'never give up, never surrender!' tattooed on her knuckles, which might be okay if she picked her battles a little differently).

I don't know if this is merely a quirk or whether it's a serious character flaw. Well, FSVO 'serious'. *grin* Maybe it's a rebellion against being an adult. Some weird thing about now that I am grown up and nobody can *make* me go to bed, I'm going to be really damn childish about whether I do or not. Is it anybody else's business, even?

:-P But I'm going now, really, just as soon as I finish reading "The secret history of Mr. Happy" on Salon.com. And putter around a bit, and ...

current mood: sleepy, but defiant

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Monday, December 10th, 2001
5:08 pm - Of Vicodin, outlook and eyelashes.
Vicodin:
I've been weaning myself off pain meds, probably slower than I could have, but anyway, I'm now completely off them. I expect I'll use them occasionally - nothing like having a few legal opiates handy. The shoulder pain I had with the liver thing is now gone. I am extremely curious to see if that means that the chunk of liver that caused so much consternation is no longer inflamed.

Outlook:
There was a period of time when I was sort of stockpiling various meds, just in case. I don't feel the need to do that now.

Eyelashes:
My eyelashes have grown back in so completely that they're starting to fall out again! (In a normal fashion.) Hurray! :)

current mood: pleased

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Sunday, December 9th, 2001
9:25 pm - snippets
Friday night as I was coming into the house after work, two gigantic owls said hello from the neighbor's tree. From the call, they're Great Horned Owls. They are astonishingly loud. The owlpages say "The male's resonant territorial call "hoo-hoo hooooooooo hoo-hoo" can be heard over several miles during a still night. I believe it. They hung out for half the night, chatting.

We haven't heard them since. I hope they find a place to nest in the neighborhood, although it would be really hard on the local outdoor cats and our neighbor's dog, Pepe. (He's a snack - I mean, a chihuahua.)

----------------------------

Saturday we mostly failed to do the things on our list. Oh well. I made cookies for a cookie exchange party on Sunday - my mother's favorite Christmas cookie, and my favorite cutouts; they're honey-lemon. Of course this took longer than I expected.

Then Gronk and I slew Diablo in a harrowing 3-hour adventure. Blech. Gronk is my barbarian; we're on the nightmare level, and life had been pretty smooth until now, but that was largely in part because of our rogue, who was so fragile against Diablo that there was no point in reviving her. I think Diablo II is quite well-designed, overall, but some of the monsters, Diablo in particular, are disproportionately difficult. I don't mind it being challenging but I was expecting a 45-minute skirmish and instead wound up fighting until 2:30 am - because once he's half-dead you can't very well give up and plan to start over next time, right? I discovered (for the first time) that Gronk's hang-time in leap attack would make Michael Jordan weep.

-------------------------

Sunday I decorated the cookies, realized how late I was running, woke up G and enlisted his aid to finish packing them away, and went off to a city-girl brunch party. Heh, of the six women there I was the only (currently :-P ) married one. I don't know most of these women particularly well, although I like them. But it's a very different way of looking at life if you don't have a partner/s whose opinions you care about when deciding what to do... I have to think about this more. I don't think it's bothering me, so much as I'm just making an obervation.

While I was out G got a bee in his bonnet and set up the lights outside. He was in a hurry, though, and forgot to check them first. Half of them are dead. :-P Well, the weather has been astonishingly good, so maybe we'll be able to fix them 'on the vine'. :)

I'm pooped! But it was a fun day. I think I'm going to bed now, though.

current mood: tired

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Thursday, December 6th, 2001
1:28 pm - Okay, I couldn't resist.

I am a Fish with a Bicycle.

My poetry kills cows, but only with an acute sunset. Four score bald men take their coffee for a walk with my conveyer belt. Death pays those who interfere with my green amusement.

Are your giraffes on fire? The Utterly Surreal Test



*grin* My bicycle is at work at the moment, so I'm only with him in a surreal sense, which is appropriate.

current mood: Fish!

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12:44 pm - My cat is a freak.
Isn't everyone's? But mine is moreso. I have just trained him to sit and be good, just so long as I keep the candied fruit coming.

This, mind you, is candied fruit picked out of my food because I don't like it.

So, actually, he's a good dining companion.

And a freak.

current mood: amused

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